Bloom

I want to tell you today about the first time my first son smiled. Every parent probably has a gooey story about seeing that first smile. With my other two sons, the smiles seemed to happen in increments. It sort of seemed like they had always been smiling. Maybe they had been doing it with […]

Dances with wolves

‘Stop using your wolf voice Mama,’ said my eldest this morning. What a great way to describe my asshole voice – the one that comes out when I have been unable to control my temper. My son was having an epic tantrum. He wouldn’t tell us why he was so upset. I ran downstairs, dripping […]

Boob talk

Breastfeeding really bloody hurts when you first try it. Newborn babies feed for hours on end. If you want to breastfeed your newborn you are going to need a lot of help because it involves much sitting down while they clamp on and feed for an absurd amount of hours. It’s very ‘bonding’ or very […]

ducklings

All these things are things

So: prenatal depression is a thing. Prenatal anxiety is also a thing. Postnatal depression, tick, that’s a thing. And pregnancy and postnatal OCD. Postnatal anxiety, yep. Postnatal post-traumatic stress disorder, yes, that is also a thing. Some women are also diagnosed with bipolar mood disorders for the first time during pregnancy or the postnatal period. […]

Swindled

When I imagined being pregnant, I was that barefoot woman, possibly doing some gardening while wearing a flowing, floral smock dress. My bump was neat and honestly, it was the prettiest bump you ever did see. I was glowing, the most beautiful I’d ever been, there was just something about me, you know? I was […]

emperor penguins are like toddlers

Captive

Parents, all over the country: Are you living in fear? Are you being held to ransom? Are your captors very short and very loud? Do you tiptoe around them so they don’t lose it and yell at you? Do they pull your hair and swing off your legs and grab at your boobs? Are you… […]